Our girl is coming any day. Maybe. She'll be here, this beloved stranger, inhabiting all that we live within, changing our life, our sleep, our view of the world. Now, 6 days from due date she is an idea of a daughter, growing inside another mother.
We've named her, calling her "Johanna" as we imagine her into adulthood, growing tall and serious and funny she is Johanna. A cool confident girl, a woman steadied by her intelligence, reaching out to soothe as much as she will be open about her vulnerabilities. Maybe.
Maybe there will be another name that she will look like when we meet her. A Willa or a Lucia, a Stella or a Margot, a Frida or a Leigh. Red, probably. Screaming, maybe. For sure she will look like a newborn creature, emphasis on the creature. Not yet a "graceful light" or a "woman of god". A beginning of a human life, a new hope for so much to come. My girl oh I cannot wait to hold you! My hands are aching to feel you.
Tucked inside now her lovely, kind, generous birth mother, so tight in there almost ready to come out, this part of our growing family we've still not felt or seen, only imagined. We will take her, so raw and fresh, and say shhhh baby, momma's here, another momma, lucky girl you have two mommas, so many to love you. So much planning has gone into your life already. Here you are, so lovely, from such a good young woman who wanted everything for you and let us be the ones to give it to you. You already have a rich legacy, beautiful girl. So wanted, so waited for, so adored.
Last night, your dad and I talked about you being anything you want to be, looking however you feel most comfortable, letting you lead when you know where you want to go and how you want to get there. We talk about all the places we want to take you and your brother, showing you the world and watching your face as you experience it all for the first time and fall in love with so much more than us. You will and you should. You haven't even come yet and I already can't bear to part with you in 20 years. There's so much we have to do between now and then. Hurry up!
And we will go from there. Always loving, always protecting and always leading to your best self until you will take over and lead us to the amazing woman you have grown into.
Saturday, December 05, 2015
Thursday, July 30, 2015
Hi! Oh yes, new music
It's been positively ages since I looked for and bought new music like I used to before when my days weren't belonging to the whims of a little human being - which is also another form of music playing 24-hours a day... But I digress, I'm talking now music for me and here are some especially good new finds that I'll listen to over over until another 3 years go by and I once again realize that I need some new tunes.
1. Porter, Huitzil - Oh my god. This song is amazing. An Aztec Anthem and I've listened to it a bazillion times. Those drums and hard beats and then the voices high and low, I just love love love this song with the same fervor that I once adored other repeated songs like Sweet Disposition. I bought their album that this song is on and the whole thing is fantastico.
2. Jake Bugg, Lightning Bolt - Who is this kid? These British kids coming out with "new" music that sounds like decades-old American yeehaw, I kinda want to scorn them because of the hubris to record something like this, but it's so good.
3. Same with George Ezra - I want to not like him, because he's like 19 years old and sounds like a healthier reincarnated Elvis, but every time I hear one of his songs I can't help looking it up - who is this?? - and I'm like, oh man, it's that kid George Ezra! Gah!
4. Sarah Jaffe, Some People Will Tell You - Such a dreamy little piece of honesty about how most people do things.
5. The Cave Singers, Distant Sures - You might think one sultry August evening, "Man, I wish I could dial up a laid back, honey-stringed acoustic guitar song with a raspy but sure voice accompanying that makes me feel okay with the passing time, wistful for beautiful times past, but hopeful for the time I have left tonight." And then you'll play this song and be like, "Oh my god, this is that song!"
6. Treetop Flyers, Things Will Change - And then after listening to the Cave Singers, you'll be in a throwback 70's mood, feeling a bit groovy, but maybe feeling ready for something more upbeat to combat all that wistfulness and so you'll play this number.7
7. Blacksmith and Dan Mangan, Vessel- The kind of song that takes you somewhere - starts off pleading with drums and then builds and add more instruments and then you're flying on Planet Peter Gabriel.
8. Gente de Zona (feat. Marc Anthony), La Gozadera - And now for something completely different... A Latino dance number because - of course I've downloaded a Latin Pop number (what, Pitbull, who me??) and this is just hip shaking, singing into the wooden spoon sweeeeeeet, mami. (Also, how fun was this video to make?)
1. Porter, Huitzil - Oh my god. This song is amazing. An Aztec Anthem and I've listened to it a bazillion times. Those drums and hard beats and then the voices high and low, I just love love love this song with the same fervor that I once adored other repeated songs like Sweet Disposition. I bought their album that this song is on and the whole thing is fantastico.
2. Jake Bugg, Lightning Bolt - Who is this kid? These British kids coming out with "new" music that sounds like decades-old American yeehaw, I kinda want to scorn them because of the hubris to record something like this, but it's so good.
3. Same with George Ezra - I want to not like him, because he's like 19 years old and sounds like a healthier reincarnated Elvis, but every time I hear one of his songs I can't help looking it up - who is this?? - and I'm like, oh man, it's that kid George Ezra! Gah!
4. Sarah Jaffe, Some People Will Tell You - Such a dreamy little piece of honesty about how most people do things.
5. The Cave Singers, Distant Sures - You might think one sultry August evening, "Man, I wish I could dial up a laid back, honey-stringed acoustic guitar song with a raspy but sure voice accompanying that makes me feel okay with the passing time, wistful for beautiful times past, but hopeful for the time I have left tonight." And then you'll play this song and be like, "Oh my god, this is that song!"
6. Treetop Flyers, Things Will Change - And then after listening to the Cave Singers, you'll be in a throwback 70's mood, feeling a bit groovy, but maybe feeling ready for something more upbeat to combat all that wistfulness and so you'll play this number.7
7. Blacksmith and Dan Mangan, Vessel- The kind of song that takes you somewhere - starts off pleading with drums and then builds and add more instruments and then you're flying on Planet Peter Gabriel.
8. Gente de Zona (feat. Marc Anthony), La Gozadera - And now for something completely different... A Latino dance number because - of course I've downloaded a Latin Pop number (what, Pitbull, who me??) and this is just hip shaking, singing into the wooden spoon sweeeeeeet, mami. (Also, how fun was this video to make?)
Tuesday, February 03, 2015
Muse Maria Makes Things
I started a new blog, Muse Maria Makes Things, not the greatest title but entirely accurate. I'll mostly be posting there now and here's why...
I’ve been blogging for years, since like the late 90’s, but since I’ve become a mother I seem to post photos only to my son’s blog (which is lovely, by the way). I tried returning to this blog, Muse Maria, and it just doesn’t seem to fit me right now. Still wanting to share and connect somehow, I thought that since my days are mostly filled by making stuff at the present, I could share that.
My intention with this is to post photos, ideas, tutorials and thoughts about things that I have made myself or with others. That includes everything from recipes for food to total house remodels! Right now there are only a handful of posts, but you’ll find some photos of the house we’ve been remodeling along with detail, and a recipe for a really great Thai curry halibut stew!
I’ve been blogging for years, since like the late 90’s, but since I’ve become a mother I seem to post photos only to my son’s blog (which is lovely, by the way). I tried returning to this blog, Muse Maria, and it just doesn’t seem to fit me right now. Still wanting to share and connect somehow, I thought that since my days are mostly filled by making stuff at the present, I could share that.
My intention with this is to post photos, ideas, tutorials and thoughts about things that I have made myself or with others. That includes everything from recipes for food to total house remodels! Right now there are only a handful of posts, but you’ll find some photos of the house we’ve been remodeling along with detail, and a recipe for a really great Thai curry halibut stew!
Tuesday, January 06, 2015
Monday, January 05, 2015
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